Age of Ultron: If She Should Be Worthy
by Black' Victor Cachat
Summary: During AoU, Thor discovered someone worthy of wielding Mjolnir. Years later, with his dying breath, King Thor All-Father made this person the heir to his power and throne. These are the stories of Lila Banner, daughter of Hawkeye, Queen of New Asgard.
1. Chapter 1

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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This was originally meant to be a single one-shot, yet then more silly little ideas kept coming to me, so it got expanded into this.

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Original Summary: During the Age of Ultron, Thor becomes distracted form the crises they face, as they he tries to cope with a horrific surprise. Short one-shot

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Age of Ultron: If She Should Be Worthy

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"If I lift [Mjolnir], do I get to rule Asgard?"

-Tony Stark

"Yes, of course."  
-Thor Odinson

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Thor was gobsmacked.

 _This cannot be happening! How!?_ But try as he might, he could not deny the sight before his eyes. And the knowledge that he had promised that whom should ever be able raise his hammer Mjolnir, would be the rightful ruler of Asgard.

Thinking desperately, he glanced around to make sure there were no witnesses, and kneeled down and whispered, 'If you forget this ever happened, I promise you infinite trips to, uhm, what was it, Disneyland!'

Lila Barton looked from the oversized hammer that she was casually carried in her hand, and back up at the big blonde man her dad had brought back to stay at her family's farm.

'But daddy could really use it for hammering nails!'

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 **Author Note:  
Lila Barton is Clint "Hawkeye" Barton's second child and only daughter, so she is not OC. **


	2. Chapter 2

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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Hawkeye stumbled across the battlefield. The Avengers and their allies had won, but at a heavy price.

When the armies of the Mad Titan had come for him, Vision had sold his life at a terrible price, decimating Thanos' generals, buying time for his wife and children to escape.

The Hulk had spoken to them, (spoken to them!), telling them how glad he was to have fought beside them. And had told Nat how much Banner truly loved her. Then the Big Guy had taken off to deal with Thanos' weapon. It had cost him his life, burning the gamma radiation right out of Banner, but he had done it.

Natasha had fought like a demon, extracting Banner from what was left of the invader's forces, while simultaneously drawing them into position for the Guardians of the Galaxy as they charged in with the military might of every other galactic power.

The others were okay, like Falcon and Spider-Man, but Clint see it in their eyes how scarred they all were from this.

Losing Steve had been the hardest to bear. The Red Skull had been found in one of Thanos' dungeons, transported there years ago by the Tesseract, and together the two bitter enemies had fought the warlord himself for the sake of mankind. The elderly fascist had died taking a blow for his hated rival, urging him on to victory. In a final desperate measure, Captain America proved what he had always been at heart: a good man.

He had rejected the corrupting aura of the Infinity Stones, the ability to make real anything he desired, and had used the Infinity Gauntlet to wish them out of existence. It had killed him, but he had died smiling.

Knowing what Steve would do, Thor had been prepared, and when Thanos was distracted by the destruction of the stones, the Last King of Asgard had struck true. At the cost of own life as well it would seem.

Hawkeye stood over the dying Thor, while the survivors of the Warriors Three wept around him. Jane Foster was there, acting from the front lines as a scientific consultant, and now she could only watch as a man that she loved, who should have lived long after her, passed on in front of her.

The remaining Asgardians mourned as well, the few remainders of their once mighty race. Thanos had struck at Asgard first, and while the gods had fought far more fiercely than anticipated, Thor had still ordered his people to retreat to Earth, knowing that was where they would be needed.

It was Loki and Heimdall who had bought the necessary time for the evacuation. Loki had proved himself a hero in the end, maintaining the massive illusion that had allowed his brother and the rest of Asgard to retreat, even as he endured unspeakable tortures at the hand of Thanos. Once everyone was through, Heimdall had reversed the Bifrost to destroy the entire planet, leaving Thanos as the only survivor.

Now these former gods would have to learn how to co-exist on Earth. Though Hawkeye was sadly aware that after all the death and devastation in this brief yet merciless war, there was more than enough living space for everyone.

'Jane,' Thor wheezed, 'I am glad that I could see you one more time, before I die.' Jane just shook her head in frantic denial, squeezing her fiancés' hand with all her strength. 'But there is one last task I must perform. My duty as king, when the line of my fathers and I has ended, and to prepare the next generation of heroes.'

Turning to look right at Hawkeye, Thor smiled, 'Ah, my friend! You are well. Is your family safe?'

Surprised that Thor would bring up his greatest secret at a time like this, Hawkeye nodded hesitantly.

'Still safe and alone on the farm?'

Glaring now, Hawkeye gave one last nod.

'Good. Privacy will make it easier.' Struggling, Thor lifted up Mjolnir, and whispered with his last breath, 'If she should still be worthy, go to her, and give her the power…of Thor!'

Away the mightiest weapon sped, and Hawkeye's eyes widened in horror and disbelief as he realized what had happened.

Smiling, Thor closed his eyes, and lay down to travel to Valhalla to see his family.

And to get away before the elder Bartons got their hands on him.

 **XXX**

'I don't care if she's your rightful queen! She still needs to study for her exams!' an angry Hawkeye yelled at the representatives of New Asgard.

Upstairs in her room, Lila Barton gave a guilty start at hearing her dad yell, and quickly floated down from her secret cubbyhole in the ceiling and sat back down in front of her study notes for math. After all, she did not want the older Barton to realize how much she was secretly studying meteorology, particularly storms, when she was supposed to be doing her _assigned_ homework.


	3. Chapter 3

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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Natasha Banner, the Chief of Intelligence for New Asgard, was trying to remember how her life had gotten to this point. Because in all seriousness, she was having a serious time understanding how she had gone from being a child of the Red Room, to becoming a woman living among former gods, living in golden halls within what was once Iceland.

Not that she was really complaining of course. After all, her present job was her favourite yet. Mobilizing vast resources to make sure her surrogate niece was safe and sound. And on that note, 'I don't care if you say there's no way Loki could have survived the destruction of Asgard. I want his corpse on a slab, and the most intense examination we've got on him. And after that, see if you can find a way to make sure his soul actually passed on to the next life or not!'

 **XXX**

Fandral, formerly of the Warriors Three and now the ambassador from New Asgard, drifted fluidly amongst the delegates at the United Nations. He had been the perfect choice for this position, ever graceful and polite, and able to charm anyone he encountered into forgetting that he was one of the most powerful warriors left on Midgard.

'But still, we do not understand why we cannot yet meet your new queen,' said the delegate from the Chinese Republic, her English devoid of an accent.

'I'm afraid that matters remain unchanged. While Thor and his father had contingencies long prepared, the truth was that they never truly expected to need them.' The other quality Fandral possessed was that he could also be a smooth liar when necessary, and it had been firmly pressed upon him that this was indeed critical. 'And so, while it may seem like our nation is functioning smoothly, the reality is that our new monarch is working hard to, oh what's the term, "play catch-up," and learn more of what is necessary for our people. And when she is not busy doing that, she is also busy gaining a greater understanding of Midgard by traveling your lands. To understand your own folk amongst whom we now live.'

Fandral was careful to note which officials seemed disturbed about the idea of an empowered sovereign wandering their nations, and bit down another twinge of distaste at this charade he must play.

Still, he could take some measure of delight in imagining how surprised the world would be when they eventually learned that the strongest and most influential person on Midgard was actually considered a minor. The reaction of the president of the country that had once been called the United States of America should be particularly entertaining

 **XXX**

Cooper Barton was doing his best to not break out chortling. Again. His little sister had been forced to demonstrate her powers to save her school's graduation class from a bunch of violent anarchists. Yet when she had shocked the attackers with electricity, everyone had assumed it was just some generic superpower, not that her very body had been modified by a hammer and magic. For even when she was not holding her hammer, she still commanded the powers of a god of thunder.

Oh, sure, dad and mom were worried, and they would probably have to move to help maintain their low profile. Yet no one could really get upset about it, Lila had done it for a good cause.

No, the funny part was how the second Thor, the secret Queen of New Asgard, was known to the world as "Lightning Lass!"

 **XXX**

Volstagg was willing to admit he had made a mistake.

Certainly not about getting his new queen more heavily involved with her combat training.

Nor entering her house without permission to steal her video games.

Taking her cellphone and diary may have been a more serious offense to a teenage girl than he had thought, yet it appeared to have been the perfect motivation.

 _No, my only regret is not doing this somewhere with a nice sturdy roof_ , he thought ruefully as a tornado descended down towards him.


	4. Chapter 4

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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It was not for several years until Lila Barton fully understood what Thor had done to her, not until when they were at the funeral for Nick Fury. For when the thunder god had died, he had not done so as Prince Thor Odinson.

But as King Thor _All-Father_.

So as his successor mourned the death of her surrogate grandfather, for whom old age and battle scars from the Infinity War had finally caught up to, she finally tapped into her true power, and made a constellation of him in the sky.

Her grief had made _stars_.

Without conscious thought she had _rewritten_ the heavens themselves.

And she was forced to accept the truth.

She was Queen Lila Thor Barton All-Mother, with all the power and responsibility that came with it.

Consequently she stopped using her powers mainly for causing snow days or perfect picnic weather. Or controlled rainstorms to water the plants on hot days. Or…

 **XXX**

Lady Sif shook her head, caught between annoyance and amusement.

When Odin had been king, his method of dealing with insubordinate subjects started at a glare and a scathing dressing down. Failing that, he gave an object demonstration of why he was a warrior king. Thor had also been willing to give a thrashing, at least until he matured. Then he had just beaten them down with a disapproving look or reasoning.

Their new queen's approach was to flick her wrist and throw Mjolnir squarely upon the foot of whoever was being disrespectful, making them unable to move from that spot. Then she would walk away to play video games until she got bored, or she needed the hammer for something.

If her victims were really upset about it, Queen Lila would get someone to record their ravings for her to watch and later laugh at.

All in all, it was a surprisingly effective way to deal with arrogant males.

 _Well, this new royal line is indeed making things interesting_ , Sif thought smugly.

 **XXX**

 _Guillotine. Definitely death by a guillotine_ , Lila seethed.

She had been practicing her stealth training by making sure that there were no hidden policies being implemented behind her back. She had no interest in being one of those innocent monarchs who discovered some subordinate was implementing some dastardly plot behind her back; her brothers would never stop teasing her about being a cliché. Yet what she had found was worse than she imagined.

 _Dating Policy for the Queen:_

 _Offer her an honour guard to escort her on her date for her to refuse_

 _Have someone clumsily follow her for her to find and then order back to New Asgard (Note: must be a volunteer(s) in case she gets angry)_

 _Hidden Eyes/mini-stealth satellites overhead_

 _No less than ten (10) aircraft standing by to deploy for air support and additional troops_

 _No less than twenty (20) carefully trained and certified scouts surrounding her unseen at all times. Scouts must also be skilled in the application of potions/tranquilizers if it is necessary to put whoever is courting the Queen to sleep_

There was even more, but Lila had had enough and was storming off to find the culprits.

Around the corner, Hawkeye was smirking to himself. _Not bad, kiddo, but your stealth training needs improvement. I was sure you'd find the_ real _dating protocols on this foray. Oh well_.

 **XXX**

 **Author Notes:**

 **Thanks to** **The Aberrant One** **for the ideas!**


	5. Chapter 5

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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Truthfully, Cooper Barton was not at all jealous of his little sister. Lila had been given a heavy load to carry, with lots of people depending upon her. All Cooper wanted to do was stay at the farm and have a nice quiet life.

The youngest of the Bartons, Nathaniel, wanted to help his sister the Queen out, but he kept changing his mind on how he wanted to help her. One day he dreamed of being her best warrior, then to be the next Heimdall, then to be an important advisor, the next day as her chief fireman.

Cooper already knew how he would help his sister: when everything became too hard for her, when too much was put on her shoulders, this farm would always be open to her. A place where she could escape from a world that had handed her a certain hammer.

 **XXX**

Volstagg shot another look down at Lorelei, giving a little smirk. The Enchantress had regretfully been one those to survive the Fall of Asgard, and had started making trouble again on Midgard. When confronted, she had made a few choice remarks on their new Queen, who had set out to help take malevolent Asgardian down.

While Queen Lila had patiently born the various insults from the Enchantress about her age, species, etcetera, she had not been so patient with the woman's comments about men.

When the groaning Lorelei eventually regained consciousness, she would discover that she had suffered wounds that even an Asgardian's healing abilities would require centuries of effort to restore her beauty. If it ever did recover, given the state of her nose. _I'm not sure the witch's throat will have the same power as before either, never mind being able to talk_.

Lady Sif had gone after the fuming All-Mother, calling in Volstagg to handle SHIELD. Sure enough, here came their vehicle, discharging the official liaison between the organization and New Asgard: Hawkeye himself.

The father looked around, surveyed the damage, and set the Asgardian off laughing with his only question:

'I guess she's still ticked about her ex-boyfriend?'


	6. Chapter 6

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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A scowling Queen Thor silently descended towards the abandoned warehouse district. While this may have seemed a cliché during the time of the original Avengers, the amount of devastation and death from the Infinity War meant that there were so many of these locations available now, that it was childishly simple to hide a base amongst them.

And if any unwanted intruders realized who lived here, they would be immediately fleeing for their lives.

Entering, Queen Lila briefly took note of the carefully dusty floor, covered in cobwebs, and with a flicker of power, she retracted her cape and armour back under her street clothes.

In a few moments she was walking through the secret door and into the high tech sanctuary within to meet with the mistress of this hideout.

Dr. Laura Fury Romanoff-Banner, the daughter of the Hulk and the Black Widow. The Mediator.

While merely a rumour to most humans, the powers that be on Midgard, and indeed throughout the entire Nine Realms, were all well aware of this formidable woman. A warrior who could defeat nearly anyone upon those nine worlds in a fair fight, and everyone also knew that they would never receive such a courtesy from her.

For her self-appointed task was to hold judgement over all the empowered and unusually skilled individuals on Earth, and keep them from getting out of line. She who was the answer to "Who watches the watchers?"

 _But I'm the All-Mother, and thus I have no fear for this woman_.

 _Besides, it would make the next family dinner awkward if I got into a fight with my own cousin_.

Not that they were actually cousins, but frankly the fact that the Black Widow was not technically an aunt was something that had been ignored for years. _Well, a serious fight at least. No one would be surprised to hear that we were wrestling about or sparring again. Just for fun of course._ It had always been in good humour or for training after all, except for the food fights, but they never did those when either of their parents were around.

The sitting Laura turns her green eyes up towards Thor, and gestured for her cousin to join her at the desk, before turning back to her work. Usually she would get right to trying to help Lila whenever the older woman appeared unexpectedly, yet she could tell that right now the Queen just needs peace and quiet. It must be a family issue too, if she is here and not back at the farm talking to her older brother, Cooper Barton. Finally, as ever, the scientist's patience was rewarded.

'Am I selfish?'

Blinking at the question, Laura looks up from her work on irradiating cells as a form of rapid tissue regeneration. 'Is the hammer not answer enough? Or how you regularly risk your life, have sacrificed your fun years, and rule a nation you wish you could escape? You are no more selfish than Uncle Clint or Aunty Laura. And you should know this, so what is the real problem?'

'…Nathaniel has a girlfriend.'

'I know. I helped run the tertiary background checks. I've met her, and it seems serious.'

'And what point do we let her know the truth? How long does my little brother have to lie on my behalf?'

Idly, Laura set her computer to run a simulation, and thought the matter over. 'Ask her.'

'What?'

'If she's going to be part of the family, we should trust and respect her. Tell her that the family has a dark secret that might endanger her if she knows it, and then ask her if she wants to still learn what it is.'

'That can go wrong so, sooo many ways.'

'I know. But the answer will also tell Nat what he needs to know about her. And if all else fails, we'll have watchers ready to intervene.'

'You're a terrible woman, you know that.'

'I'm also someone who wants to see you all happy. Your brothers do not see themselves as living in your shadow, but how will any partners they take feel? To be in-laws to a secret queen?'

'Do you think they live in my shadow?'

'No more and no less than I do.'

Glaring at the ambiguous answer, the second Thor stormed out. Outside the hatch though, she stopped and looked back, 'She'll be coming over for dinner this Friday. Want to come?'

'Your mom already invited me,' Laura responded with a smirk.

'…Don't be surprised if your food tastes salty.'

 **XXX**

 **This represents one direction I might take my OC from my main Marvel fic when she grows up. I have like, three different ideas.**


	7. Chapter 7

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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Clint Barton, the Hawkeye, the legendary and still-living (even rarer) Avenger, looked like he might cry. "What do you mean you're not going to the prom?" he asked in the age-old tone of daddies wanting to see their little girl's all grown up for just one magical moment.

"Because it'll be nothing but trouble," Lila informed him, the Queen lying across the couch while chewing gum and reading a magazine.

"Do you really hate dancing that much?" her little brother Nathaniel inquired.

Rolling her eyes, Lila put the magazine down. "Look, if I go to the prom, something will happen. I know it, and you know it. Some alien invasion will happen, one of my arch-nemeses will attack, or _something_. And my night will be ruined. So I'm just staying here where nothing interesting will happen."

Clint accepted the compliment good-naturedly. SHIELD scientists kept petitioning him to study his home, because while they did not know where it was, they did know that _nothing_ bad happened there. No villain attacks, no invasions, so mysterious diseases, impersonators appearing, nothing. He and Laura were too smart to risk the Golden Goose though, and kept those meddlers far away.

[A few hours later]

The whole family was staring at evening news as it reported how Lila's high school prom had been attacked by one of her repetitive villains, who had been convinced she would be attending. Everyone had been terrorized, but no one was hurt.

"See! See!" the goddess cried out, trying to hide how embarrassed she was.

 **XXX**

Queen Thor of Asgard sat across from the newest King of the Frost Giants, both sides sharing glares during an impasse in their diplomatic talks. "You know," Lila finally ground out, "what exactly is your guys beef with Earth and New Asgard?"

"The crimes that Odin and Thor committed against us!" the King roared.

The Queen facepalmed, "Of course it is. What else could it be?" With a resigned expression she rested her face on one hand, "Do you have any idea how much trouble they've caused me? So what's your beef?"

The Frost Giant's eyes flickered towards the stiffening Asgardian escorts when Lila broke in again, "In fact, do you guys have anything to drink? I think I'll need something stiff for this."

Surprised, but accepting, the other monarch consented, and soon a barrel of alcohol that was safe for either species was brought. But with a sly glance at his countryman, the King also slipped a little something into the mug, and Lila threw it back without a care.

[Time skip]

Thor and the Frost Giant had been drinking for a while now, with Lila gulping it down without any encouragement, although their hosts seemed to be waiting for something else to happen. In turn, she had been making sure her counterpart was making his way through several glasses too. A few too many glasses at that.

The King blinked and blurrily looked at the drink in his hand, a stray memory trying to warn him about something, but then his new drinking buddy clapped him on the back laughing, and he rejoined the Asgardian in another round of liquor.

[Time skip]

"And he never took me to Disneyland like he promised!" a drunken Queen whined as she pushed another entire keg towards her new best friend.

"Yeah, he always was a stuck up [untranslated]?" the Frost Giant king slurred out.

"A what?'

"A [untranslated]. …You don't have em? Well, they're these things with these things that do these things, and even do this one really gross thing."

"Ah, I understand," Lila nodded sagely.

[Time skip]

"Well that went well," a bright voice rang out as the Asgardian entourage exited the Bifrost back on Midgard.

Whipping around, Sif's planned rebuke dropped from her mind, every scathing word halted, as she observed her Queen now standing upright without the slightest sign of inebriety. "Your Majesty—?"

Ignoring her, Lila Barton took another satisfied look at the new treaty between the Frost Giants and Asgardians, before glancing back up, and winced a little as confusion returned the anger to her loyal vassal's eyes. "Oh, right. Sorry. I wasn't really too serious about what I said about Thor and Odin. Much."

"You were drunk," the warrior maiden stated matter-of-factly.

"I have an Asgardian physiology and a super-spy's training." Noting the incredulous looks she was getting from all the Asgardians now, Thor clarified, "Dad and Aunty Nat were only allowed to teach me the more satisfactory ways of dealing with any sickos who might try to pick me up in a bar if they first taught me the more discreet ways to do so. That includes learning how to identify and switch drugged drinks, drink everyone else under the table, and pretend to be drunk myself. Who knew they were so useful for a diplomat? Slipped the guy his own micky."

Visibly gleeful at her subjects' consternation, Thor all but skipped out of the room.

[Later]

"Lila Barton! What's this about you getting drunk!?"

"That's not what happened! Honest!"

"Up to your room young lady! Now!"

 **XXX**

In what was formerly the United States of America, Scott Lang, the Ant-Man, laid curled up on the couch with Hope Van Dyne-Lang, his wife and partner as the Wasp. Cassie Lang sat on the floor beside her dad, forgotten the dolls by her side as she watched the news as attentively as the adults.

"The United Nations was taken by storm today as various delegates voiced their support of the ongoing movement for the American Republic to create legislation for superheroes and others with powers," the news anchorwoman declared. "The debate took an unexpected twist when the representative of Asgard, Fandral, announced that his Queen, who remains unseen by the rest of the world thus far, was in full support of the Registration Act. After the applause died down though, Fandral went on to also state that any heroes that did not want to register would be offered diplomatic immunity by Asgard. The succeeding delegates then revealed that their nations were still looking for alternatives, and were unsure about America's proposed legislation. In other news—"

"Daddy, doesn't 'diplomatic immunity' mean you could do whatever you want?" Cassie asked curiously.

"Hmmm, yeah, I guess it would," Scott mused with a smirk.

"Oh, no, there goes the world," Hope cried out with false drama.

"Yeah, probably for the best it's not going to pass now," her husband conceded.

 **XXX**

 **Author Notes:  
The America Republic used to be the United States of America because after Thanos came a few maps had to be redrawn. Badly. **


	8. Chapter 8

For better or worse, I do not own any of the Marvel franchise.

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If She Be Worthy

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The Odinsleep.

For Odin Borson, Odin All-Father, this had been the time when he had lain in a state of deep sleep to recharge the Odinforce, the immense magical force that made him the king of warrior gods and one of the most powerful beings in the universe. Yet during such a time, he was left as vulnerable as a mortal, leading him to often put it off as long as possible. He preferred to go several years between its use. This permitted him to personally oversee the daily affairs of Asgard, and monitor the doings of the rest of the Nine Realms. The consequence of this however, was that when he was forced to rest, he might collapse where he was standing, and his absence was proportionally longer.

Thor Odinson, Thor All-Father, had held the throne and power too briefly to require this ritual to restore himself.

For Lila Barton, Thor All-Mother, her power had been thrust upon her whilst she was still but a child. Upon learning how necessary it was for her to set aside the time to rest, in a coma-like state, her parents and adult friends had worried about how vulnerable she would be. The young Queen however had been more concerned that she could be rendered unavailable should she be needed.

Yet it was still essential if she was to continue to wield powers capable of rewriting the heavens.

Literally. That is why in the night sky above what was once the United States there is now a constellation in the shape of Nick Fury of SHIELD. By accident.

Thus, Lila Barton had begun the practice of entering what she now dubbed the 'Thorsleep,' more often and for longer intervals than required, following the reasoning that while she was rendered defenseless more often, unlike the Odinsleep she _could_ be awoken (albeit with great difficulty), to instantly fight whatever endangered her world and subjects. Instead of resting for days every few years, she rested for two weeks four times a year. Since she was also recharging the 'Thorforce' more often, it appeared her capacity was growing larger even, and upon awakening, she would be fully refreshed and ready to fight for truth and justice.

(And expresso. She was _ten_ when she discovered it, and there was a standing bounty set up by her parents and senior subjects for the identity of whatever idiot thought it was a good idea to introduce her to that stuff once when they urgently needed her alert after an interrupted Thorsleep. You want to know terror? You don't _know_ terror until you've seen a queen of warrior gods with the constitution of a pre-teen running around hitting people while on a caffeine high.)

For years the Thorsleep had seemed a perfect solution, requiring only some careful scheduling to deal with issues like missing school for those weeks (she refused to sleep through Christmas or Spring Break) and catch up on her homework.

And then puberty kicked in…

 **XXX**

Twenty massive alarm bells were placed in a circle around the bed of Queen Thor I, ready to be rung at the command of her ruling regents (from a good safe distance, and nowhere near her bedroom), while the ceiling was adorned with pipes that would dump water kept just a hairsbreadth above freezing all over her.

Fortunately, that was not necessary for today.

Mumbling and groaning as she found herself waking up naturally, Lila pulled herself out of her sinfully comfy bed and checked the digital calendar for the date and time. Rusty mental gears shifted as she figured out how many days she had been asleep, and then she turned around to get back under her warm covers. Sadly, they were already being whisked away by an ingenious mechanism for just this reason.

This Thor had come to decide she _liked_ sleeping in.

But she did _not_ enjoy confronting the cost of doing so.

Finally, she made her way to the bathroom, where she stopped to glare at her appearance in the mirror. Her hair had gone two weeks without being washed, her acne had flared up again in the meantime so that it covered her face and her breath was awful. After one emergency awakening, all of her so-called "loyal" friends and subjects who had been present at the battle had presented her with boxes of various toothpastes.

One villain had taken the time to lecture her about proper hygiene and skin care until she had broken his jaw.

She washed and scrubbed and scraped away all the dead skin and bulbous pimples, and cleaned out enough oil from her hair to fry up several servings of French fries.

Then she dressed herself, going for a nice elegant gown that lent her grace and disguised all the concealed weapons. _Aunty Nat always gets the nicest gifts!_

Not bothering to cover her mouth as she yawned, she unlocked her door and stepped outside.

"Good evening, Your Majesty," greeted Hogun of the Warrior's Three. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, I guess. Anything interesting happen while I was out?"

"No."

"Good."

"Although," and then Hogun pulled a stack of official looking papers out from behind his back that made the air stale just by existing, and from the corner of her eye she saw more of the hideous paperwork in the hands of more of her so-called 'loyal' vassals.

"Oh look at the time! It's almost ten, better get to bed!" she called as she sharply turned on her heels.

The door slammed shut in front of her before she could cross the threshold.

"Who's the monarch around here again?" she groused.

 **XXX**

 **Please Review, and I will get back to you!**


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